Tomorrow is Eid!! Did I forget to tell you that I am not happy!!
I am not a big fan of it anyways. I have started hating it since I lost my dad. Yes, I don’t celebrate it because there is no Eid without dad!! I know it’s muslim’s Eid and that celebrating it is a must for but I can’t see myself in it, happy and cheerful as well!! I have been having this feeling for two years now and I don’t think I will get over it!!
Deep inside, I don’t wanna enjoy it. What’s the use ,eh? There is no taste of joy whatsover in it for me. I have become homey ever since. I haven’t been to parties, weddings, whatever is the thing that might cause joy to people but sadness inside my heart!!
The only time I succumbed to mom’s will ended up with failure. I went to my cousin’s wedding 10 months ago. I was shaking like a leaf at the entrance. I went inside and my legs were hardly carrying me. The moment I entered, my family memeberes came to greet me expressing how glad they are to see me. I felt nothing but that the Earth was moving!! I couldn’t bear it and I collapsed!! Mom became sadder more and felt sorry for pushing me into it.
Dad, I miss you 😦